Jacob Kickyouinnuts


Jacob Kickyouinnuts was an orphan. Placed in the care of monks out in the wilderness he knows nothing about his parents or where he came from. Despite the monks being very caring and even handed in their treatment of Jacob he never felt like he fit in there. Not that he was out stealing like a common thief but he was caught more than a few times talking people out of their money. Now this is not normally a bad thing if given to the temple, but he did not give it to the temple and the monks there had all taken vows of silence.

Knowing that they needed a representative the monks allowed Jacob to continue speaking and he learned Elven from passing traders to the nearby Elfish settlement If there was a deal to be negotiated for extra supplies, payment for healing, or trading for the goods the monks created. Despite some really bad deals the monks tolerated he learned to be a smooth talker. Often if there was a “charity” he could double or triple the income by smoozing the crowd. Granted not all of the doubling or tripling made it back, but the monks never knew.

He trained himself extensively to read those around him gaining insight into human nature. He watches his targets carefully looking for a tell or evidence of lying. Once he sees what he needs that warm fuzzy feeling washes over him as he guides the mark to doing what he wants. He prefers manipulation to direct conflict. He realize long ago that healing was manipulation and studied hard to learn all he could from the monks. Not only is it often the right thing to do, something he cannot seem to help himself from doing, but it often is easier to manipulate those family members after you have healed their kid.

Studying history and religion were also required by the monks. While these were not his favorite courses he knows that knowledge is a valuable weapon and information is a commodity lighter than gold but sometimes just as valuable. Using his skills he often found out about changes in market patterns and would sell that knowledge to traders to allow them to maximize their profits. Unless they fucked the monks over then he would in turn screw them over with bad information.

In his spare time when the monks were not watching him or his studies were done he would run off with the elven kids from the near by village They would spend their time running about the countryside living off the land using snares and making camp. They would also despite their parents objections run into the local under dark and adventure in the spaces below. There he learned about various dungeons, how to keep his head on a swivel, and the need for good athletic skills.

Despite being strong and mildly agile he has limited knowledge of weapons and their uses in combat. He has learned to defend himself but the teachings of the monks about weapons and combat rang true with him. The order refuses to use anything that is only meant to kill. Anything that can be a tool should be considered such. Daggers and knives are tools despite their effectiveness as weapons. Javelins and spears are similar in form and function He outright refuses to use anything like war hammers or swords as their only function is to kill other beings. He is not a coward by any means. One time a demon attacked the eleven village while he was there negotiating for trade goods.

When the monster attacked he realized there was no negotiating with it. Hell bent on destruction the only choice was to fight. Without hesitation he tossed in with the beast. The elves fought side by side but by all accounts they were outmatched. Jacob was tossed aside and nearly killed by the monster. Laughing it stepped over him and tossed back a table. Two children had hidden there a brother clutching his younger sister. The thing roared in pleasure and its claw was descending as something awakened inside of him. A heat a power surged in his very soul. Ignoring his injuries Jacob jumped to his feet and sprinted at the demon.

Shouting in a language he did not understand he lept in the air and twisted his body releasing his spear as he whipped around. The monster never stood a chance. Jacob focused all of his power into the weapon and it hit the demon in the red viper slit iris. The monster fell over dead and Jacob collapsed exhausted. He woke up back at the monastery in his bed. One of the monks handed him a note and left. On the note was the phrase, “You’re ready”

His bags were packed and his horse ready for him. As he left one of the monks handed him a golden cross on a chain. Jacob had never seen it before but somehow knew it was important to him. He wears it to this day under his shirt. Jacob mounted his horse and rode out never looking back. There is little that he is certain of, but he knows that a power spoke to him that day. A power that wants him on the road fighting that which is evil and protecting that which is not. He might never be a good person, still prone to swindling the stupid, but one day he will meet that mysterious power and he wants to be able to stand tall on that day.


Jacob Kickyouinnuts, level 4
Human, Cleric

Str 19, Con 12, Dex 10, Int 6, Wis 14, Cha 12.

Str 16, Con 12, Dex 9, Int 6, Wis 14, Cha 12.

AC: 18 Fort: 17 Reflex: 13 Will: 17
HP: 44 Surges: 8 Surge Value: 11

Diplomacy +11, Religion +5, Heal +9, Insight +11, History +5

Acrobatics +1, Arcana, Bluff +5, Dungeoneering +4, Endurance +2, Intimidate +3, Nature +4, Perception +6, Stealth +1, Streetwise +5, Thievery +1, Athletics +5

Cleric: Ritual Caster
Human: Improved Initiative
Level 1: Toughness
Level 2: Weapon Proficiency (Tratnyr)
Level 4: Skill Focus (Diplomacy)

Bonus At-Will Power: Lance of Faith
Channel Divinity: Turn Undead
Cleric at-will 1: Sacred Flame
Cleric at-will 1: Righteous Brand
Cleric encounter 1: Healing Strike
Cleric daily 1: Cascade of Light
Cleric utility 2: Cure Light Wounds
Cleric encounter 3: Split the Sky

Ritual Book, Adventurer’s Kit, Flint and Steel, Sunrod (2), Waterskin, Chainmail, Dagger, Spear, Javelin (5), Cloth Armor (Basic Clothing), Holy Symbol, Riding Horse, Tratnyr
Gentle Repose, Comprehend Language

Jacob Kickyouinnuts

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